Traveling With The Wind and Nicholas Sparks
On the long list of plans to get ready for this six month South American journey is finding a safe place for my little red Kia Soul. Fortunately, my cousin, who lives in Seattle, generously offered to give it shelter while we are away. However, with Michael coaching and his team in the third round of the CIF playoffs, I was going to relocate my car on my own. It had been years since I’d traveled long distances alone. I have fond memories of occasional twelve hour sojourns from my Maryland home with my children to visit my parents in Kentucky. While they played in the back seat or slept, I would enjoy music and the endless hours of parental downtime to let my mind wander along the winding road. But in the past twenty years Michael has been in the driver’s seat and I’ve willingly taken the co-pilot position. I felt it was my job to keep our minds active with crossword puzzles, news stories, and talking about current events. Taking long trips by car was always something I enjoyed.
However, what I didn’t like was Michael’s aversion to the music I chose, my desire to listen to books on tape, and my recommendation for food that was healthy. But, just having him do the driving was worth the sacrifice of all of these things. This time I was going it alone and I imagined the drive as an endless succession of congested towns, winding roads, and horrible weather just to make the trip seem totally impossible. For weeks I was picturing the distance from Manhattan Beach to Seattle as being endless and taking several days. I figured my sciatic pain,that activates after a couple of hours of driving, would force me to stop every two hours so I could stretch. How could I ever make any progress at that rate?? Driving this distance by myself caused me the type of dread that would be similar to the kind familiar to anyone who ponders driving on the 405 at rush hour, going to the dentist for a root canal, or even jumping off a cliff.
But on December 1st, armed with my favorite music CDs, several books on tape, and healthy snacks, I set off on my own. Not far from leaving the congestion of the 405, with my Kia hugging the unseasonably windy I- 5, my mood suddenly changed. I was in control, I could stop when and where I wanted, and sing at the top of my lungs without annoying anyone. I even challenged my sciatic nerve to be quiet long enough to make it to Redding, CA in one day. It was just me, the wind blowing clouds of dust, and tumbleweeds into my path and Nicholas Sparks narrating his autobiographical book “Three Weeks with my Brother” as my constant companion. I soon realized that this book of around the world travel was one I’d read a few years ago and really enjoyed. Hearing it again brought back memories of places we had visited on our last trip, and it increased my excitement of the ones we would visit soon. The story speaks to the importance of travel and experiencing different cultures. Also, in recalling his past, he fills the time with stories of the casual unstructured way he was raised in Inglewood, California, parental conflicts and closeness of siblings. He also talks about the fear of leaving work and family behind to travel around the world with his older brother. Like me, he describes the dread he feels as the time to leave draws near. He also describes the guilt he feels leaving his wife with five kids (one year old twin girls, a two year old, an autistic 7 year old and 10 year old boys) and the pressure of publishing deadlines. “There will never be a good time to go his wife reminded him, but you must go, you need to go, you need the time away.”
These words hit a cord with me. I realized it was important and even possible to get into the car and take a long trip alone. I needed to put all the stress of planning and packing for the “big” trip behind me. I needed to forget the worries of going to strange, and possibly dangerous countries, to embrace the challenges of new cultures. I was enjoying not only the present road ahead, with beautiful mountains, the wind blowing colorful leaves off the trees and even a police escort through 10 miles of dust so thick as to nearly obscure all landmarks of the road. I realized that with the congestion in LA how much I missed seeing open fields, snow-capped mountains, winding roads and tall pine trees. I loved leaving the city behind and marveling at the still wide open spaces and endless green rolling hills.
Several hours into the drive, the fear of driving alone and traveling to distant lands seemed foolish. I realized that leaving the comfort of home, my bed, neighbors and friends and security of a job is something everyone should do even for just three weeks or even three days. As I was leaving Red Bluff (my first stop), I overheard the receptionist at the Comfort Inn tell a co-worker, “All I have to do is get through these next few days and then I’ll have the weekend off.” Those words “get through” resonated with me. Why should any of us just endure even a few days of something we don’t enjoy doing? Is putting one’s life on hold possible or even desirable? What if that lady never sees that weekend? Why not do something you enjoy? Failing that, why not make what you do enjoyable? What if the weekend doesn’t live up to her expectations? When work becomes just that – work, then it is time to retool, restructure, and re-evaluate what is really important.
It became clear to me that I feared the future. I feared stopping a job I loved, hated leaving the comfort of my bed, my house, our town and warm California weather. In other words, I had become soft, foolish and acting way older than my years. Shaking things up, pushing the envelope of time constraints, and stepping way out of my comfort zone was not only possible, it was important. Travel, no matter how far, is necessary to reawaken the senses, challenge the mind and introduce us to new friends of different cultures. So now I no longer dread traveling to places unknown, even though it could be a bit scary. More importantly, I will embrace the flexibility of not having “every minute” planned. Next stop- Nosara, Costa Rica, December 19, 2011.
Bravo, Cindy, BRAVO!!
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