Costa Rica: Giving Up Control

December 21, 2011 

We arrived in Playa Guiones (near Nosara) Costa Rica on Monday, December 19th at 7:30 in the morning, after two flights, the first one leaving LAX at 12:30 am.  I was unable to sleep much due to cramped seats, and the hectic pace I’d set for myself over the last month before our departure.  Even though most of my lists were completed and thrown away, or quite short, I found there was so much more that needed to be done in the last few hours before leaving for good. There was still garbage to put out for collection, a refrigerator to finish cleaning out, last minute laundry, packing up the rest of our clothes to leave at home and stuffing the last minute items into our suitcases.   I was barking out orders to Michael and we were like two crazed animals, going in all directions, fur flying and our anxiety level rising!  So crazy was our departure that we found out later that we had left the front door ajar.  We are thankful for a good neighbor who discovered this and was able to secure everything for us later that night.

I believed that once we drove away the mood would begin to change; we could relax as we had the last time when we left our home for several months, but that was not what happened. With adrenalin already coursing through our veins, for some unknown reason, we rushed to return our rented car, rushed to meet our friend for dinner at the LAX theme restaurant, rushed again to get in line to check bags. Then we worried about having to stand in a long line for what seemed like hours. Top that off with no sleep on the flights and a treacherous three hour drive. When we finally arrived at our destination in late afternoon, as much as I needed to, I couldn’t sleep.  I decided to do the next best thing, of course, get organized! So I unpacked while Michael slept like a baby.

Miraculously, all our bags (including ones we brought for Page) arrived perfectly. I was delighted that all my months of planning had paid off and we were finally here and so was all of our “stuff”.  I was still in control, and I had everything I needed, or so I thought.  I couldn’t find the one thing I thought I wanted the most, my new flashlight!  Yes, a stupid, replaceable flashlight!!   I was certain that I’d packed it and after going through the suitcases about six more times I began to tear up and go just shy of crazy!  I berated myself for not being more careful.  I wanted to go home and search there.  Being irrational is just one sleep-deprived sign.  I know it sounds silly, to want something so badly, but we are basically camping out in a cabin-like atmosphere.

We are surrounded by jungle, and our nearest neighbor is a large iguana that lives in a tree near our door.  Tropical birds, geckos and iguanas skitter across our metal roof in the mornings as our wake up call. I am constantly hearing sounds of life that seem to be in the room even though they are safely a concrete block wall away.  I rationalized that a flashlight was important to see anything in the night that might be skittering under foot across the tile floor.  My imagination conjured up several unpleasant scenarios, and I just knew I’d be attacked by something in the night!  Even I knew it was crazy that I was ready to have a melt-down. But really, what I wanted was to crawl back into bed, have a good cry and go to sleep!  I should have been filled with excitement and joy that any second I would see my daughter for the first time in several months!  Crying over a lost flashlight seemed like a really stupid thing to do at the time!!  However, even after a wonderful dinner with Page and her handsome Costa Rican boyfriend, it took multiple drugs to calm my nerves enough to get some much needed sleep. 

Finding paradise is not easy in this under-developed nation.  Our drive here was quite harrowing.  The roads are narrow, have high shoulders and can be quite dangerous.  Michael was tired so I had to stay alert to keep him from running off the road.  There many are narrow one lane bridges, long stretches of dirt road with dust flying and obscuring multiple large potholes.  Fortunately, our Hyundai sedan rental car survived the trip, and we hope that we are as lucky going in the other direction on January 3^rd.  Accidents are not uncommon here and make car rentals very expensive.  Then they tack on a little surprise, a required $300.00+ insurance cost.   However, the required insurance only covers a small portion of the repair expense.   We were offered 100% coverage, but that would cost something like $450.00 more. Michael was not thrilled with what we felt was close to highway robbery and quickly declined.  Now, my city dwelling- driver is realizing that we could lose a car in the ruts on the roads in this jungle town.  “Slow down” is a frequent mantra of mine.  Fearing expensive repairs, we try to leave the car parked and spend our time with Page or on the beach, which is just a short walk from our hotel.

The beach, Playa Guiones, is beautiful and covered at low tide with pretty shells.  The water is about 80 degrees, or so it seems.  I can say that it is refreshing at first but soon feels like bath water once you are fully wet and swimming around.  This makes me very happy.  Today, however, for the first time in my life, I nearly drowned.  The tide was going out and there were too many frequent sets just over my head so that I had a hard time catching my breath long enough to rest.  With Michael face down on the beach (working on his tan), I had no one to signal to that I was in a bit of a jam.  I kept wondering how he would explain my demise to our friends and relatives.  So, not wanting to cut our trip quite so short, I told myself to stop panicking and fought my way to the shore. To be fair, Michael had warned me to not go out too far.  I guess that I misjudged the current and conditions of the water and will not swim alone again!  Speaking of Michael, he is practicing his Spanish at every opportunity. He engages anyone who will play along.  At first I worried that I would feel left out of the conversation but I find I am picking out the basic information and figure he will switch to our native tongue when I need more clarity.  

I am happy to find that my daughter Page has a nice setup here.  She has made many improvements to her home, which now looks beautiful. She has many good friends, and has a beautiful Pilates and dance studio that keeps her very busy and solvent. But most importantly, she has a place to relax and surf where she never has to wear a wetsuit or go very far to find good waves.  Because of all this exercise, she has tightened every muscle into a high performance machine.  That first night, as we walked to the restaurant for dinner, I noticed that, when the light hit her just so, I could see her black thong and muscular buns under her adorable dress.  Being a typical mother, I told her what I’d noticed, assuming she didn’t know how thin her dress seemed to others.  But her response made me laugh, relax, and begin the process of giving up the control I’d been using to prepare for our trip.  As she walked ahead, hips swaying, so in the Latin groove, she looked at me, smiled, winked and said “I know!”  Later, the next morning as I opened my computer cover, I found my “lost” flashlight safely tucked inside!  Time to slow down and get into the Latin groove!!!